I recently was led to a rather old concept applied to business entrepreneurship: 10X, in a business book written by Grant Cordone in 2016. Ten X..."X" meaning exponential power amplification. Initially I was confused by why I would be guided to a book laden with false masculine concepts (e.g., domination, endless be-better, never-good-enough striving, "annihilating" the competition) But, if you know me, you know that when something confuses me, gets me curious, or is unexpected, I trust the divine source energy of synchronicity to see what is showing up. And so here we are.
If you've rarely experienced synchronicities, here's what I mean. The universe brought 10X into stark view repeatedly to get my attention...throwing synchronicities in my YouTube viewing path (and no, I hadn't so much as typed in 10X.) I literally within one week heard Mel Robbins, Bruce Lipton, and JJ Virgin, and even an old Oprah interview! (all inspirational to me) all from different years of posts, mention it. Even as I finish this post today, another 10X was put in my path of awareness. That is the kind of synchronicity I've learned to turn my curiosity toward.
So what is "10X"? While math-lovers see math as a beautiful work of art, and may have a fond, nostalgic smile forming across their pointy-headed faces, others of us may not even remember the concept of exponents. (Personally, I struggled with math, and around age 11 witnessed mild trauma-bonding as my exasperated parents drew straws to avoid helping me with fractions and counting change.) For me, math does not have the magnetic lure of, say, tacos, but I digress...If you don't remember exponents, here's a catchy little reminder because it's an important basic to get the rest of this post.
With the tutorial jingle out of the way, let's drill down into this a bit more, because, for the love, what does a mystic want to ask you to do math for?
Despite the fact that 10X in its original form is a bit on the false masculine side (I soon will share more on this toxic version of what is otherwise an energy I whole-heartedly celebrate and invite you to explore) it offers us concepts we can transmute to our benefit and apply to our self-care efforts.
If you skipped the primer, let's start with the main takeaway: factoral increase...an amount of increase that indicates rapid, massive growth. Two to the 10th power, for example is far bigger than 2x10. Cordone advocates 10X as massive effort required to "get ahead" of the competition. Competitive energy aside, stay with me as we borrow from 10X thinking to reframe how we focus on our self-care.
Cordone suggests that to be successful we must never be satisfied with the present moment, and points to his own relentless pushing, shoving and never-satisfied-with-self mindset as evidence of his success. What I admire about Cordone's approach is the energy of unrelenting commitment. And so I wondered, if we let the dissatisfaction energy and other false masculine conditioning fall away from 10X, how could we apply 10X to self-compassionate, spiritual development, self-care and healing work? Could the laser-focused drive and action of authentic masculine energy be expanded beyond our outerwork...career goals, building our reputation, outward identity...and offer us a way to balance with the softer approaches (gentleness, self-compassion, grace) typically found in innerwork? Ultimately, is there a way to honor and blend the two as we create a more empowered, authentic and joyful "new normal" for ourselves?
I have to chuckle here, because I'm fairly certain if Cordone ever reads this blog, he will scoff at the fact that one of the very types (woo woo people) he pokes fun at for advocating presence and being satisfied with one's self is applying his concepts to inform journeywork.
When we let the false masculine notions fall away, we are left with three key takeaways we can apply to our self-care and be better for it:
1. Unyielding commitment
The common ground between 10X in its original form, and the path of a mystic like me, or, for anyone shifting away from the old paradigms and an old version of self, is dedication. When you move into a new level of showing up for yourself and your life in an "all in" sort of way, this becomes a dominant theme, even if a bit gentler than Cordone's demanding approach. If you find yourself back-burnering your self-care regularly because of your other life demands, I invite you to ask this question: Why do I tend to exclude myself from the care I readily offer others? Discover what underlying limiting belief could be in the way of a notion that you don't deserve your own commitment, or that you must always put your needs last, etc.
2. Where our attention goes, energy flows.
The power of most any experience is proportionate to the amount and consistency of attention to what we offer it. Further, the words we use with ourselves (inner thoughts) and others give specific power and energy to a situation, yet we generally are a bit lax in how we frame things. Abraham Hicks is a great resource for teachings on how our words frame our experiences. And, in one of the 10X Sacred You sessions we focus on this more closely. The bottom line is,
if we continue to look at self-care as anything other than integral to our overall success and well-being, we will continue to operate and create our life from an imbalanced position.
This imbalance manifests in a lifestyle that attributes the leftovers of our time, energy and effort available to self-care. Rather than defining self-care as an tool pulled out of the toolbox when we are already stressed, overwhelmed, etc. we have an opportunity simply through our dedication and attention to redefine what a joyful, successful life looks and feels like and include it within routines that offer us structure and comfort.
3. Unapologetic disregard for the status quo (and imo, an old and actively dying paradigm)
I have to admit, I love the disruptors, the innovators, and rebels (movies, shows, historical figures...for instance, right now I'm loving Charlotte of Bridgerton, very loosely based in truth, for her ability to navigate then carefully blow up status quo at just the right moment. And then there's real IRL Effie Hotchkiss, who not only crossed the US by motorcycle in 1915, but had a sidecar for mom!)
I'm always fervently cheering for them in my heart of hearts.
Even if they seem a bit "crazy", they are my "celebrity crushes," because they are daring and brave.
And most importantly, in their authenticity, they embody their truth.
Often we are in awe of these rebels because we think they possess more bravery than we have.
Bravery is one of those things that we've all pulled from within ourselves at least once, right? If you're alive on the planet, you've used it to overcome something, at some point, including your own fears. Fear-based thought and action runs deep from thousands of years of human genetic wiring to survive, so we'll always have a built-in alert system that raises our awareness to question...do we need to be ready to spring into a defensive/protective action? Pushing past whatever we may *think* others may think seems way more innocuous than getting ourselves out of harm's way of, say a jungle cat. So why does an alleged change in our reputation create such a fear response in us? Because we've learned that being vulnerable in certain circumstances may cause us pain, and we wish to avoid emotional pain or embarassment. Sometimes gathering our courage is simply a matter of perspective...
As we grow and get to know ourselves, we begin to have other experiences that sharpen our skill of discernment. When we apply discernment to bravery and vulnerability, we know when (and it's more often than you think!) and how to stand in our truth despite status quo, and do so in a way that is without the jaggedness of conflict or any form of aggressive energy. We simply are.
If you want the remainder of your year to be more proactive when it comes to self-care, I invite you to begin with these three simple concepts. This focused attention, and (10X) exponentially more of it, is how you will feel more like you are not just surviving, but consciously creating your life.
Do you choose to be an unapologetic explorer?
When you can give yourself permission to really explore different forms of self-care and use your experiences to truly inform your life, you'll move away from the old ways of doing inner work (only when there's "time" leftovers approach) and being dominated by outer work (all the time), and toward consciously creating life as a journey...journeywork.